The Books are coming the Books are Coming!!!!

Tomorrow our new school books arrive. M knows this. But I asked him " M a package comes tomorrow with our books , do you want them tomorrow or for Christmas? He said " Hmmm, I want my math book on Christmas, I want a fresh new book , all clean that I can write in " . So cute. I think I am just going to go ahead and wrap that one and the book on the atom but the rest I am going to get into tomorrow.

We are getting a science book and a Latin book as well as one on ancient history. As far as toys. I think he is going to like what he is getting. He is getting Dread Pirate the board game, a Chia pet, Huge amount of Lord Of the Rings action figures, a remote control car, A Dali print(for Russian Christmas) and I am going to try and pick up the Cybertron Transformer for him this week. He isn't getting a lot but I think he is getting some nice things that he will really get enjoyment from.

I told him this year we weren't getting bunches of things but that they would be all the things that he asked for.

We got a tree the other night. It is nice. M literally adores it so I am just so glad it makes him happy.The funniest thing...We have a gandalf figurine on it as well as a Star Trek enterprise figurine. Nerds much ...Yes much....

Culinary Failure.....

These week , I am going to come right out and say it....This week my desserts have been awful. The pumpkin pie, I left the foil on the edge of the crust too long and it didn't brown properly, My sweet yeast bread cinnamon Buns.FAILURE. I don't know where I failed there because these are fail proof buns but I failed. It was terrible. They just weren't quite ''right''

The squirrels even snubbed them this morning. But my hunger for desserts prevails. Ok I did succeed with one thing this week and that was a meat loaf recipe that came out so surprisingly well my son said that he LOVED it and wanted me to make it ALL the time:) I made it with Whole Wheat Nut Bread instead of bread crumbs and I also made my own Barbecue sauce for it. Whatever it was it did the trick.

Ok back to desserts! So I am guilty. I went out tonight and got boxed Carrot cake and pre-made frosting. I am going to mix the Dunkin Hines Frosting with a half a package of cream cheese because the pre-made Cream Cheese Frosting never tastes like homemade with the tang of the cream cheese. I don't know why that is but I am going to try throwing the cream cheese in with it to see how that goes.

So I am ashamed of my boxed cake but I won't be ashamed to scarf down a labor free Carrot Cake with loads of frosting.

I just don't know why my desserts are failures lately. Actually I know. It is always some little thing. I gave my pie away. It is edible. Someone else might even say it was good , but it just wasn't good *enough.

So out of sweet tooth desperation I have resorted , this week anyway , to boxed cake.

But next week I return....Martha Stewart's Cream Cheese Pound Cake is going to be my birthday cake. I'm making it...I don't care...It is some good cake. Seriously good cake.

Local Violence

So the day after the trip to New York I woke up in the middle of the night and proceeded to go downstairs for some soup. My grandmother was up. This is not unusual. I run into her occasionally on my kitchen midnight snack raids.

We got to talking about a town commotion I had heard a rumor about earlier in the evening.

I find out from her that near by a mother of a 6 year old girl had been killed by an abusive , and estranged ex-husband. Chills up my spine. The latter part was not yet known by me. All I knew was that a mother had been killed.

I think it's normal in these days of constant fear to think of yourself in a similar position. As a woman what would happen if I or anyone of my ''sisters'' was subject to a random act of violence.

I do not have an abusive ex husband but still. Before I knew the issue had been domestic I opted not to go out with my son to the library that day. Even after I found out it was domestic and not a stranger who had killed this woman I still opted not to go out. It felt to near to my heart. I also considered the size of the town and that undoubtably I had probably seen this woman and her child , maybe walking or talking, maybe at some function but I didn't know her .

The more I found out, the more I was troubled. She worked at the school near by, and even though a restraining order was in effect , her husband still had visitation rights with the daughter. A fact that I just found out today. A fact that made me sick to my stomach. The woman dropped her daughter off twice a week at the children's room in the library so this man could collect the child. I thought about the way that woman must have felt having a court order to do this, while knowing this man was unstable. And I can't help but wonder about her last moments as a victim of this monster and the mental anguish of her final hour.

It has just disturbed me deeply. Knowing that I have crossed the path of this woman in the past and that we shared a common thread of motherhood. My brain frequently considers the plight of a family sharing custody of a child. Some negotiations and plans are done amicably and without fear. think that this is wonderful. But of course then you have situations like the above (which I am not claiming to know all the details ), but where a woman is forced to share custody with someone who has a criminal and troubled recent past.

How many alarms go off in these woman's minds. How many courts won't allow woman to flee at the sounds of these alarms due to a ''custody negotiation''. I don't have an answer to that. But I know the answer is probably too many.

A full day

We were in the city again today. I took M
to the ballet with a HS group. It was really nice. I love being able to do these things with my son. I love being able to meet other HS'ers finally.

It was cold today, and I did not get enough sleep last night. Every time I have to go somewhere the next day I have this internal alarm clock that wakes me up too early . So I must admit that today I was quite sleepy but that's ok.

We also went to the toy store. M and I road the Ferris Wheel inside which I think rocked his world haha. He bought a Transformer and a stuffed kitty. He LOVES stuffed animals. They had a lot there at reasonable prices. I was pleasently surprised.

My partner and I were talking tonight and he said it was so funny because even though we have a small place and we aren't wealthy we manage to really enrich my little one's life. We do some things on a shoestring and manage to get him out of the house, interested and interacting with the world around him.

It's exiting to see "M" so environmental too. It is something he talks about and questions often. Today on the bus he was talking with me about population and we had a discussion about terraforming. He does math problems on the bus. He extends further and further the fibonacci numbers. He is an interesting kid. I sometimes wonder what he will become. Before it was a vet, then he said he wants to work for GreenPeace. I have a sneaking suspicion he might end up working with numbers in some capacity , or maybe he will become a teacher. He is only 6 who knows. When I was 6 I wanted to become a botanist a writer and a singer. But I always loved entomology.

Right now I am on again off again reading a book about insect/arthropod chemical defense. It is really interesting. The internal structure of these insects , amazing. It is all so complex for such small creatures. It makes me want the spring back so I can sit in the yard for hours looking under logs and underneath the ivy for spiders, moths and what M and I call ''Erm the Worm" haha. I miss the woods by my old house. I don't miss it consciously during the day but I dream about it a lot. I dream often about forests, and rain, and grass and the things I don't feel as connected to where I am.

It's why I make sure "M " understands science and environmentalism. The environment in which I grew up, I had that built in inclination toward a bond with Earth. In an Urban Fringe I would hate for him to lack understanding about the natural world and nature. I would hate for him to become plugged in and tuned out to the natural world. It's a problem I think with today's youth. That plugged-in mind set.


Lark Song

A Dream About a Girl Who Drew Diagrams

In the rain
Everything was final
The words fell
Catastrophe
All that I feel
And she said to me
That parts of the universe
Were smaller still then myself
They didn’t feel
Or breathe or believe
They didn’t trouble themselves
Over my tragedies
She drew them out
In points of black
Clusters of star dust
Resembling galaxies
Resembling microbes
Resembling things
That makes up the parts of me
I had to abide by these truths
I had to abide by what makes up the parts of me

By Lark Song

Slow Weekend

I wasn't exceptionally productive this weekend. I am getting a GORGEOUS ring from my partner. I am so exited!!! It was something that really caught my eye and it has a milky pale stone in it which is something that I love. White in it's many shades is really my favorite colour.My partner is amaaaaaaaaaaazing.

But anyway we took something of a break for the holiday. Only a two day break really but with the weekend and all we really didn't do a lot of school which I think really throws us off. We have our routine and that's important. He said to me " We have to do triple the work on Monday" . And not in a,Darn I don't wanna' way but like a...."Mom I want to catch up " way. It's good to take a break but its also good to get back to your 'regularly scheduled program".

This week we have a fun thing going on. We are finally going to meet up with a group of other homeschoolers. AP homeschoolers! I am really exited to finally get a chance to meet real live eclectic , gentle parent, homeschoolers. I think that this is going to be really nice for us. Plus that it's going to be at the Museum so how can you go wrong:) Science and attached homeschoolers. That is where it is at.....

Tomorrow we are going to Make MORE Rice Crispy Treats, do some science experiments and catch up on math and spelling. Actually we have a busy week ahead. We will be twice in the city.

Thanksgiving came and went. It went along nicely actually. I think my family is finally starting to 'get' homeschooling. I think they are seeing that he isn't socially isolated and that besides being a little overly polite on occasion that he is a regular kid with just a different academic structure that works for him.

This was a long time coming. It was hurtful the eye rolls I got and the way people disrespected my decision to homeschool. I understand that people were skeptical and I understand the apprehension to not just jump up and rejoice over the concept but I think respectful discussion would have been the more logical approach as opposed to petty gossip and offhand remarks.

That's all really lately. I have been randomly busy very much with a myriad of family events.I can't wait for the normal week to commence. The holidays are nice but it's nice to be back....

I LOVE my Son's mind!

So I am sitting down to dinner tonight...My guy is sipping his soy milk and munching on his Macaroni and Cheese and out popped another one of his little ''ideas" He looks at me and says:

"You know Mom the Earth 'might' actually be flat"

And I say "Well in space it looks round, just look at the globe , it's a sphere, the Earth isn't flat"

And He says "Yeah but mom, think of it. " (He picks up a plain white piece of paper from the new paper he just got) "Think of it mom....Look at this piece of paper.........(He shows me the surface)

'"It's flat right???.....OK now look at it side ways. The paper is made up of tiny particles. It's really bunches and bunches of atoms thick, even though it looks flat.....So now think about the Earth. Think about the trees and the sky scrapers. Say the sky scrapers are atoms, say the people are super strings. What about that? If everything is particles, if all things on the Earth were particles, then the Earth could actually be flat....I mean in the same way that the paper is flat."


Yeah these things come out of left field. Whoosh. This isn't the first time he brought this scale idea up though. About a year ago he asked me "Mom if Earth was an atom how big would the rivers be?"

I adore his mind. It fascinates me. He thinks about some interesting things.It makes for really great dinner conversation.

Oscar Wilde vs Uncle Wiggily And Why The Rabbit Won

My son reads…..anything….that is, he can read anything . But that doesn’t mean that I still don’t read him bedtime stories. I do, every night. I have been reading to him since infancy. Everything from Scientific American to The Pokey Little Puppy to Green Eggs and Ham in Latin . We read here.


Often times I read him a gem titled Popular Mathematics. Don’t gasp all horrified. This is a fabulous book. Gloriously old and out of print. Beautifully brown covered cloth boards. As plain as Jane, but holding true to the old Maxim , that, "you can’t judge a book by it’s cover". It Gives wonderful colourful descriptions of primitive tools in geometry, fabulous little historical tid bits,cleanly worded information on mathematics while remaining interesting and fun for everyone involved. We like this heavy brown book. We like it a lot. All hail the eternal triangle and all of that.


Those that know me , know that I am a collector of antique books. I think the hobby has progressed more steadily since my son’s birth , this side-note of my existence. It is these books. I enjoy reading and I have a true love of antique children’s books. There is something especially lovely about a book , almost centurion in age that has worked through generations as a tool of knowledge , maternity, of childhood, imagination, wonder and innocence.


I love the perfect dresses on the mothers , the respectful clothes and actions of the children. Even if they are sexist,and out of date, even if they are pure fantasy in this day and age, these books have something very special that current day children’s picture books, for the most part, have lost.


So much has been replaced by the crass, the crude, the violent, the inane bold type face in garish colour, that I find comfort in the faded ink pastel of "Buddy Jim", "The Cat Whose Whiskers Slipped" , or ‘Rhymes for Kindly Children". From the last I will share you one such ‘kindly rhyme"

The Kindly Rule
My teacher says
that animals
Deserve the best of fare:
Clean beds
Fresh water, healthful food
And very loving care
And when their eyes
Look up at me-
Such deep and trusting eyes
I wonder
How can one forget
To treat them otherwise

This book, was published 1937. I can’t tell you how much I love my books. But I am sure that one could gather. Anyway it came to me the other night to read to him some Oscar Wilde. I knew that I did not want to read "The Birthday of The Infanta", because I knew I felt it too dark so I re-read, the others The Happy Prince , The Selfish Giant and so on and so forth and I made a judgement call and I decided I wouldn’t read them to him now.


I love literature. I actually really enjoy dark literature. Right now I am reading Death On the Installment Plan by Celine, Sometimes I sit at the park reading this nihilistic stream of consciousness , other days some semi panic stricken book or article on environmentalism , atheism, French surrealist poetry or any other sort of thought provoking madness that I can manage at the moment. So I guess it may seem horrifying to those who have a flair for the dramatic, myself included , why I wouldn’t include Oscar Wilde’s fairy tails in our bedtime story repertoire .


It’s simple. The stories are entirely too fatalistic, fraught with tales of martyrs and entirely pointless altruism on the part of birds and statues to be good for any child of six. Not that I don’t love Oscar Wilde. I have a first edition of one of his books, even , haha! But still, I couldn’t see myself reading them to my son. especially before bedtime, highly illogical.


Of course I want to expose him to literature. And I do, even the poetry , but there is far to much sorrow and grief in this world for him to be exposed to it in such a dramatized fashion at this point in time. Others may disagree and that’s fine. But for now I have decided that we won’t be going Wild with Wilde. As for the adults and older children, these Fairy Tales are a must read. Just utterly beautiful and heartbreaking. If you have not yet read the complete fairy tales, you have been missing out.

As a side note I think also the lesson regarding the tales is of course one of repeated altruism. They are written carefully and beautifully to make an impact. I think that with my son this is something that comes so natural to him, whether it be nature or nurture, he has a joyful and yet selfless kind way about him. Strong tales of selfless woe like this , for such a sensitive child could be potentially depressing. There’s no call for that.

So we come now to Uncle Wiggily. Which is what I read tonight. To be Precise, Uncle Wiggly on the Farm and the Story of Uncle Wiggly and The Oats. In which Uncle Wiggly calls on Doc Possum because he feels ill and the possum says he must go to the country to get away from it all. There is only one picture throughout this entire Uncle Wiggily book, unlike the others.This particular book I believe is from the 1930’s. But it was well enough because Uncle Wiggily is embossed on the cloth cover and you get a fine idea of what he must have looked like falling into a barrel of slippery oats,big old rabbit ears, top hat and all.
So tonight the rabbit wins, Wilde will have his time, just not today………….

From The Book Of Virtues:Kindness to Animals

Little children, never give
Pain to things that feel and live;
Let the gentle robin come
For the crumbs you save at home;
As his meat you throw along
He'll repay you with a song.
Never hurt the timid hare
Peeping from her green grass lair,
Let her come and sport and play
On the lawn at close of day.
The little lark goes soaring high
To the bright windows of the sky,
Singing as if 'twere always spring,
And fluttering on an untired wing -
Oh! Let him sing his song,
Nor do these gentle creatures wrong.

From The Book of Virtues, Edited by William Bennett (Simon and Schuster)

The Rundown

I am in the process of trying to organize my clothes. I removed EVERYTHING from the dresser drawers so I could reorganize and sort the jumble and rotate out the summer stuff and bring out all of the sweaters etc. You know...

Geez what a huge pile of clothes I have. So many skirts , random shirts and funky jackets. So anyway I am organizing all the wild scarves, of every silken , velvety , feathery , knit, madness of colourful rainbows that is my scarf and wrap collection and I come across a couple of my son's ties. And it dawns on me. I am envious of these things. I mean these guys, all these men walking around wearing ties. And I am thinking, I want to make the transition, make the leap from scarf to tie. I want to wear a tie so I am going to tomorrow. I have absolutely no sense of fashion anyway so why not. I thought the tie looked cool while I was playing clean up/dress up/ hang up or fold.

Anywho....Lessons went well today.I had a lot of fun talking to my son tonight after dinner. We talked about a lot of things. I was actually talking to him a lot about my childhood. Especially about my chickens , geese and ducks and when I used to play in the woods and the field. And about how I used to be afraid of the hallway at night when I was really little.Just random things about random things. But he is a good conversationalist. A good listener and he articulates very well when he speaks . .He has a very positive energy about him.

I went food shopping and random shopping tonight. I bought more socks because there seems to be a sock vortex in the house. The same one that's in every one's house. The one that sucks up single socks and leaves you without pairs.

I also bought a gallon of apple cider. YUM!

Well to be honest, I am just procrastinating right now over the HUGE clothing mountain that I have created and must sort before all meanings of the word 'organization' are lost amongst the leather boots and velvet jackets. Someone come to my house and organize and fold my clothes for me. I will bake you cookies.

It must be some form of culinary Karma

I am so confused. See I seem to have on my hands a picky eater and I cannot , for the life of me comprehend why. I was raised by a chef and literally spent half my childhood in a restaurant after school. I have had so many different foods passed under my nose that I can count on one hand the foods that I either dislike or won 't try. I am NOT a picky eater by any stretch of the imagination besides the fact that I don't often care for 'cheaply' made foods, Doritos are excluded from the category of cheap food because I DO enjoy junk food.

But on to the wee picky eater in the house. Oy, it does frustrate me at times. There are so many foods that he does not like. Chicken must be a certain way. Soup , we are down to only a few that he will eat. Vegetables must be disguised or he would only eat corn and potatoes. I could go on but this is basically your average picky eater story. Here is where it gets weird............

He likes food from different cultures. He is picky against AMERICAN food. Ok I can't say that I totally blame him. But it makes shopping confusing. Ok he will eat Japanese Edamame(steamed Soy beans) but won't eat string beans, Won't eat certain types of fried fish but will eat sushi, Loves Chinese food, Loves spicy food, and adores East Indian food. Adores the Indian shops alone even. Again I can't say I blame him. But what I mean is that the cultural food is often more adventurous and even then if I don't make the Chicken Yogurt Curry and Saffron rice EXACTLY right , he won 't go for it. The recipe has to be just so.

For lunch he had a spiced Onion Indian bread and a large bowl of cottage cheese which he liberally spread on the bread. Last night he out right refused to eat turkey and stuffing lol. So I am going to once again attempt a transition from American Cuisine to a more Asian/ Asian Indian cuisine.

I am not the best chef but I have some experience . I just have a hard time getting the hang of Asian cooking. It is really an art. But I have a enough Basmati to feed the whole block,and a cabinet chock full of exotic spices/and growing, on top of a growing collection of Indian recipe books that I can maybe make a stab at the semi transition once again. For the sake of my strangely picky little boy and his suffering limited palate.

Macaroni and Cheese , Roast Chicken and Mashed potatoes and corn are all well and good, but like I said, I grew up in a chef home and picky I am not, adventurous palate I am. Oh did I mention he likes flounder baked in cream and dotted with onion and butter. So yeah , he also like French food a great deal.

So maybe his palate is not so much picky as it is overtly sophisticated. He seems to enjoy dinner the most when I slave over the stove a minimum of two hours. Cookbooks open, fingers a mess, apron askew, hair in a bun.The more prep the better haha.

The bottom line. Action must be taken and an intense meal plan must be created.